


Hearts and Flowers

by NeoVenus22



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Multi, OT4, Stargate Crossover, Valentine's Day, holiday fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-11
Updated: 2010-03-11
Packaged: 2017-10-07 21:40:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/69507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoVenus22/pseuds/NeoVenus22
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Holiday discussions can be disastrous.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hearts and Flowers

"Who is Valentine and why does he have his own day?" Vala asked, stealing the apple from Sam's tray before she could protest.

"He's a saint," said Cameron, snatching the fruit back and returning it to Sam. "He was martyred for... something. Ask Jackson."

"Only if he can explain why bloody and often unjust death seems to be represented by hearts and small naked children."

"I'm sure he could, but do you really want to hear it?"

"No," said Vala decisively.

"Good girl," said Cameron.

Sam smirked, taking a bite of her apple. "John, I bet you're just thrilled to be back on Earth for the holiday."

"I'm beginning to suspect you planned this," said John.

"Why would we go and do something like that?" she returned, smiling innocently.

"How does Atlantis usually do Valentine's?" asked Cameron.

"We didn't do anything," said John. "Being completely isolated from Earth and not having commercials shoved down our throats every five minutes was kind of nice." He frowned. "Until Dr. Brown found those heart-shaped flowers."

"No expectations," said Cameron, in a wistful sort of voice. "That is nice."

"Men," said Sam, rolling her eyes.

John's eyes closed. "Shit. It just occurred to me that I have two girlfriends now."

"Hey, don't hold out on me," said Cameron, poking him in the chest. "I expect candy, too."

"Ooh, we get candy?" said Vala, sitting up eagerly. "As in, chocolates?"

"Sweet tooth," John muttered, smiling to himself.

"Unless you like those disgusting chalky things," said Cameron.

"Hey, I like those disgusting chalky things!" said Sam. As revenge for her taste being insulted, she turned to Vala and asked casually, "You've seen the commercials, right? You know what the boys are expected to do?"

"Diamonds," said Vala promptly. "Big ones."

John let out a soft groan.

"Mhmm," said Sam. "And don't forget the candy. Or the flowers. Or the lingerie."

"Sam, please," whined Cameron. "Don't give her ideas."

"Too late," said Sam cheerfully.

"I look good in black," Vala informed the boys. "And red, actually," she offered, after a moment's thought. "Isn't the holiday celebrated in pink, too? I look good in that. Actually, there isn't any color I don't look good in, although I suppose if you were making the argument, in that situation, the less fabric there is, the less the color will matter. It doesn't matter, though. I'll require a variety of styles in a variety of colors, if you please."

"She's going to clean us out," John said to Cameron.

"I promise you I'll make it worth your while," said Vala. "Isn't that the purpose of this little 'holiday' of yours, anyway? The shameless plying of the women with baubles, in exchange for wild sexual favors?"

It was times like this that they didn't wonder if Vala understood Earth and its cultures a lot better than they did as natives.


End file.
